


Sensations

by sandorara



Series: The Dumpling Chronicles [11]
Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Body Horror, Crystallisation, Future Fic, Hurt/Comfort, Knifeplay, Loss Of Sensation, M/M, Magic, Male Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Marking, Miqo'te Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Painplay, Porn with Feelings, Transformation, Unsure Future
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-12
Updated: 2019-08-12
Packaged: 2020-08-20 02:34:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20220355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandorara/pseuds/sandorara
Summary: ”Make it hurt, please,” he’d finally whispered, as each day, more of his body was being eaten away by the crystal, leaving him missing touch in places he did not know he’d wanted it.





	Sensations

**Author's Note:**

  * For [DraiochtEve](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DraiochtEve/gifts).

> This is sort of an AU, of a possibly even near future, where the crystallisation process has sped up. Maybe because his purpose was completed? Maybe he was existing on borrowed time all along, holding out to make sure he'd be there and ready when the Warrior of Light arrived. Maybe that time simply ran out.
> 
> Mostly, this is a way for me to explore the changes happening to him and what that may make him feel.
> 
> Also, I was challenged to write "fluffy knifeplay".

”Make it hurt, please,” he’d finally whispered, voice breaking and face flushed in shame. He’d held it back for so long, yet not long enough, telling himself that the feeling of normal touch was enough, that G’yozah’s gentle, caring hands and lips, softly touching what remained of his skin was enough.

It did feel good. It felt comforting, sometimes it made all the bits of him that still could, shiver. G’yozah’s hands between G’raha’s legs would still make him shudder, shake, feel jolts through his body as he’d come.

It was just that with each passing day, more and more of those sensations were lost to dullness. To the vague feeling of being handled through thick glass. Like if someone touched your nail, nothing else. Barely there.

With each day, more of his body was being eaten away by the crystal, leaving him missing touch in places he did not know he’d wanted it.

He had not been able to explain it, why the process had now, after well over a hundred years, suddenly sped up. He wondered sometimes if maybe his body had simply served its purpose now. If the longevity he’d forced upon it using the tower had simply run out, or if— what had really slowed it down, was his own will power, his own _need_ to stay alive, for the day his hero would arrive.

For the day he could give up himself for that hero.

Maybe, just like him, the tower had expected the same. And it was simply proceeding as planned.

He didn’t know why, but it hurt. It hurt to see the worry in G’yozah’s eyes every time they carefully undressed. Every time they’d lie so close, bodies entangled, G’yozah would trail his fingers along edges, trace the new patterns and commit them to memory. It was unreliable, sometimes weeks would pass, and no visible change would happen. Yet other times a whole new patch of skin could be lost within days.

So each time, G’yozah would kiss him all over, with a smile on his lips. He’d nuzzle his nose into his skin, taking deep breaths, the warm air hitting G’raha’s skin giving him goosebumps.

G’yozah was good at smiling, good at all the grins and the ear wiggles, at making G’raha feel so thoroughly loved and cared for. Making him both accept his fate all over and over again, as it had all been worth it— for this man and for all of this world, and wish he could stop it, remain as he was.

So G’yozah could keep kissing his skin, over and over again, the number of kisses needed never decreasing.

But he couldn’t.

And for each time, as there was less to feel, less left of his body that would properly react to G’yozah’s hands, he felt himself wanting stronger sensations.

Anything to _feel_.

”Hurt?,” G’yozah had mumbled softly, an ear twitching in that way G’raha recognised as him being a little surprised, confused even. ”Like… biting?,” he asked, the weak sensation of his fingers sliding over crystal, where G’raha had once enjoyed just that.

”If you bite hard,” he’d answered, shame turning his face as red as the roots of his hair still were. For now.

G’yozah had lifted an eyebrow, grinned and nodded. And then he’d been rolled onto his side, G’yozah’s lips —and teeth— quickly finding remainders of skin, sharp pain burning through G’raha.

He’d gasped, he’d moaned, tears had stung in his eyes as G'yozah's sharp teeth finally dug deep into his skin as he begged for more. It was a strong sensation, it made him dig his fingers into G'yozah's skin, hold his head in place to _keep biting_. And with G'yozah's hand stroking him, and tears in his eyes, he'd felt the most he had in a long time.

G'yozah had kissed the bite mark, licked it, and held G'raha close.

***

Teeth did not pierce enough. Though the pain was— uneven in a good way, it didn’t always get there. It often felt like it could be stronger, like he’d want G’yozah to simply tear off a piece of him, just for him to get to feel it.

It was odd that his nerves still even worked, that his body was holding together, that he could feel the hand yet not crystallised, his legs— that the way the crystal had long since gone through his waist, down his hip, circling his leg. The way it must have severed any live connection in his spine, crystallising it all. Was his heart even still beating? He wasn’t sure.

But he could still feel, and the more he felt, the more he wanted. It made him feel alive. Made him feel like G’yozah was really there, really making an impact on him. Like they could still connect. Him, G’raha, not the being of crystal he was becoming. Connecting through sensations. Both pleasure and _pain._

G’yozah’s eyes filled with confusion and worry as G’raha handed him the small knife. So G’raha smiled, holding his own, still human palm over it, closing G’yozah’s fingers around the handle.

”Only shallow ones? Please.”

How many times had he not begged for things now? How many times had he not used the world ‘please’? Though at first it had been embarrassing, taken courage, he’d slowly come to realise just how much G’yozah’s own enjoyment came from how much he could make his partner enjoy it. How G’yozah was ready to ask for, and take, what he wanted, yet so often, he would become even more enthusiastic about a chance to fulfill G’raha’s wish. G’raha understood, eventually, that for G’yozah, G’raha’s pleasure was his own

So slowly, he’d become more daring, more confident. And it was with that confidence, he now pushed for a line to be crossed. Biting, clawing— That was all natural. That couldn’t be considered dangerous. This was different.

“Raha,” G’yozah started, his free hand taking hold of G’raha’s shoulder. He could feel it, the feather-light weight of it, like a distant echo of touch.

He squeezed his hand around G’yozah’s again.

“It makes me feel like I’m still real. The pain.”

“You are real, Raha, you’re right here.”

He hesitated for a moment, then decided to say it.

“But for how long?”

G’yozah took a sharp breath, his body tensing up and ears falling back. How else could he react? But G’yozah was strong, he had faced so much loss and so much grief. G’raha knew that better than many, knew everything about him. All the paths he’d walked, all the bonds he’d shared.

Sometimes he wished that his plan had not failed, that he’d taken all that light with him into the void and disappeared. Though he knew his ruse had been seen through long ago, though he knew G’yozah had _known_, even sadness then would have spared the man from this. This _unknown_. And the pain that would follow, after a deeper attachment.

G’yozah nodded, and his hand grasped the knife, freeing it from Graha’s hand and carefully placing it on the bed next to them. Letting go, he a little further climbed onto the bed, leaning back against the headrest.

“Come here, back against me,” he said, voice even, strong, not a sign of weakness. Almost a gentle order.

G’raha smiled, letting his open robes fall to the floor, revealing his now so overwhelmingly crystal blue body. To G’yozah, it was nothing new.

As he sat down, he wished he could feel the man’s chest against his back. If he leaned his head backwards, onto his shoulder, he would feel some. If he spread his legs, his still mostly unturned leg would touch G’yozah’s. Skin against skin. G’yozah’s arms wrapped around him, lips kissing his still soft and furry ear.

Hands travelled, nails scratching along the edge of crystal by his hip bone, from where it had twirled down his leg. It was almost amusing, how somehow, for now, his crotch was still untouched. How it was still possible for him to feel sexual pleasure, though he could barely feel his partner’s skin against him.

G’yozah’s hand trailed lower, fingers brushing ever so lightly against him, making his breath hitch, before moving on to his inner thigh, nails softly scratching the still sensitive skin. He shivered. And as a hand returned to him, stroking, he hummed softly.

He saw G’yozah reach out to the side, fingers closing around the handle of the knife, and he let his eyes fall close, turning his face towards G’yozah and breathing in his scent. His exhale was shaky and slow, and anticipation prickled in him as he felt G’yozah move. And then the cool, sharp tip of the blade rested gently against the skin just above his hip bone.

”Is here okay?,” G’yozah asked, and G’raha nodded against his neck. ”Yes.”

”I love you,” he whispered, and G’raha’s heart skipped a beat, a breath forgotten, as he added the lightest of pressure, the blade making the most shallow of cuts.

It stung, even so small a cut, so shallow, and it _stung_. He could so easily let his entire being focus on just that one spike of sensation, though it did not last long. There was lingering pain, the warmth of small beads of blood pushing their way out. But—

”More,” he mumbled, and he felt G’yozah nod behind him. ”Let me know when to stop,” he answered, though it was clear they both knew G’raha would not.

One cut, two cuts, more— shallow still, but longer. G’raha shuddered, the stinging, prickling, almost tingly pain making anything left of his body react. He let out a moan, a needy whine, any signs he could give, to show how good it was. To feel.

Eventually, G’yozah grew a little bolder, the cuts varying in shape and length, though all still shallow only barely making him bleed. Even so— It was good. His breath was heavy and uneven against G'yozah's jaw, and he knew G’yozah could see just how it was affecting him. The way his body would almost jump in his arms, tense up, how moans would spill from his lips as the knife sliced his skin.

His hip must have been covered in cuts then, as the knife slowly wandered down the still unturned, bare inside of his thigh. G’yozah’s heartbeat was quick and loud next to him, and G’raha noticed the way his breath hitched as G’raha shifted his hips, arching his back at another light cut on such sensitive skin.

”Raha…,” G’yozah whispered again, voice shaky. G’raha knew it well enough now, the way he sounded when turned on but concerned. G’raha understood.

”You can heal them later. I promise. Enjoy it with me? Please?” He reached up, hand pulling on G’yozah’s hair enough for him to nip at his neck as he shifted his hips backward. G’yozah swallowed and then chuckled softly. A kiss to his hair.

”Fine. That’s a promise.”

The cuts came slower then, but deeper, making him gasp, shudder, even shout. It burned, ached, but as G’yozah’s other hand stopped carefully holding him in place as he cut, and instead travelled back to his crotch, making the waves of pleasure and pain mix, enhance each other, G’raha felt like he was melting.

The bed sheets would surely be far too stained in red to ever be saved, but surely that only meant, that a piece of him, a piece of this moment with G’yozah, would remain for as long as the cloth did.

And with such strong sensations, it felt like release came all too soon, yet at the perfect moment. He was panting, a silent scream hanging from his open mouth as G’yozah’s firm hands spread his own blood over him. His body spasmed, shook, and his crystal fingers dug into G’yozah’s skin so hard it whitened.

Many, long and trembling breaths later, he guided G’yozah’s hand still holding the knife to the side, leaving the blade covered in red on the sheets. He sat up, turned around, and looked into G’yozah’s eyes. They were wide open, pupils so dilated you could barely make out their edges, yet the only feeling they radiated was _love_.

He kissed him then, hard, desperately, and G’yozah’s hands went up to his shoulders, his hair, whimpers escaping his lips into G’raha’s.

Not many minutes later, G’yozah came into his hand, head resting against G’raha and hands clinging to him.

G’raha held him close, feeling all the skin he could, the warmth mixing with the still remaining pain from the deepest cuts. The pain would fade soon, patched up by G’yozah’s warm aether, but for now, he could feel it.

”Thank you,” he whispered into an ear. ”My Yozah.”

***

”I’ve been thinking,” G’yozah mumbled, and his breath tickled G’raha’s ear where they laid, nestled so close together. G’yozah’s fingers were tangled with his, thumb stroking over what was left of skin on the back of his hand. He let out a small hum in response.

”You said… that the healing feels warm.”

”It does.” It took the pain away far too soon, but it did provide sensations of its own.

”Only in your flesh?”

He shook his head gently. ”No, it spreads a little, it is aether after all.” It was G’yozah’s turn to hum.

”I want to… try something,” he said then, and sat up, untangling himself from G’raha and climbed off the bed. G’raha felt so much colder right away, without G’yozah’s bodyheat against him.

G’raha rolled over, and looked after G’yozah as he left the room, only to soon return— with his _rapier_. G’raha chuckled.

”There’s not much skin left to cut now, you could have brought that one out earlier.”

G’yozah stopped, looking a little surprised, then smiled.

”Not for cutting,” he said, leaning the blade against the wall and climbing back onto the bed, with only the crystal medium in hand.

”I don’t know if this will work, or if it will even— I don’t know, feel good? But…”

G’raha shifted as G’yozah climbed over him, gladly answering the kiss as he leaned down. G’yozah’s teeth grazed over his top lip, sucking it, nibbling, and G’raha sighed into it. Though his now mostly crystal lower lip could participate, could make G’yozah gasp, for him, the sensations were concentrated to only half his lips.

He loved kisses. He loved kissing G’yozah.

Eventually, G’yozah pulled back an ilm or so, his hair hanging down and tickling G’raha’s cheek.

”I want to figure out how to make you feel good, even if you’re all crystal.”

”Yozah…,” he whispered. ”I’ll be…”

”We don’t know,” G’yozah interrupted him. ”And I’ll still love you. I want you to feel that.”

G’raha just breathed for a moment, a heavy lump in his throat, yet a fluttering in his heart. Then he whispered a soft ’okay’.

G’yozah smiled.

The medium was placed on the bed sheets no more than a few ilms away, as G’yozah shifted to sit, back leaning against the headboard. He patted his lap, and G’raha complied, rolling over to rest his head and shoulders on G’yozah’s thighs. He knew how heavy he was now, he knew how little he could control how much of that weight he placed on G’yozah— But they had been through that conversation so many times now, he knew there was no point to it.

G’yozah would want him on him anyway. In fact… More often than before, G’raha found himself on top of the Warrior of Light, despite his own worries.

He shifted again, turning his face to rest his crystal cheek against G’yozah’s belly. He could feel the faint sensation of G’yozah’s hand travelling down his arm, so weak yet there. Sometimes he wondered if it would be easier to simply feel nothing at all, than this echo of touch, only reminding him of what he couldn’t feel.

“Okay,” G’yozah mumbled, and G’raha left his thoughts there, to glance up. G’yozah’s eyes were closed, and there was a hint of teeth on his lower lip, like he was either worried or concentrating very hard. Or both. His right hand was already resting on the medium.

G’raha had felt magic many times over the century and more he had spent in this body. He’d been hurt many times, and healed. He’d been hit by spells in battle, he’d focused his own — _the tower’s_— aether to regenerate… He did have an idea of what to expect.

But would it really feel… _good_?

G’yozah’s hand moved down his back, and somehow, G’raha could have sworn that as he moved, the feeling of it increased— That the lower he went, the more he could feel. He could feel _warmth_. A small ‘huh’ left his lips, and his brows furrowed. The warmth increased, and it was like the crystal was… sucking it in, almost like a sponge, he felt it not only on the surface, but _inside_.  
The hand was on the small of his back now, fingers resting over what used to be his favourite spot to be scratched, where G’yozah would easily make his back arch within moments, and make him unable to stop the pleased noises.

A spot that had not been scratched for many a moon, long since crystallised.

_Heat_, almost burning, and it spread through his entire back, like a pulsating wave of warmth that felt so oddly familiar, and he found himself reaching up to hold onto G’yozah, his heart suddenly beating faster.

“Y—ozah,” he whispered, his voice cracking as another increase in heat went up his crystallised spine.

“Can you feel it?,” he asked, a note of hopefulness so clear in his voice, and G’raha’s heart ached.

“I can— it’s, it’s so warm,” he whispered, closing his eyes and pulling his legs closer to him, curling up to push his back against G’yozah’s hand.

“I’m… Not sure how much to push, it’s not too much is it?”

Of course, G’yozah was holding back. This was fire magic, wasn’t it— Offensive magic, magic to kill with. Magic that _had_ killed, when wielded by G’yozah’s hand.

Again, G’raha’s heart ached, and a different kind of warmth filled him. Taking a long shaky breath, he moved his hand to rest on G’yozah’s arm.

“More, please,” he said, a smile curling his lips, thinking of all the times he’d asked for just that.

“Please tell me to stop if it gets too much.”

“Of course.”

He could hear G’yozah take a long, shaky breath, and then the heat increased suddenly, almost like a small burst, and he gasped audibly at the feeling. Then as quickly it was gone, along with G’yozah’s hand.

“That felt… good,” G’raha said quickly, and he could hear G’yozah exhale in relief.

“Good,” he said, and the hand was back.

Another sharp burst of heat, just at the small of his back, then fingers dragging up along his spine, spreading pools of warmth wherever they moved, the heat going inside him slowly spreading through everything he was, burning along the edges of his remaining flesh, almost painfully so. It was a different pain than he would usually ask for— but he found himself shuddering, shivering, as if he was still miqo’te all through.

The hand travelled back down, over his hip, and onto _skin_, and he yelped, the heat stronger there but still _good_. His thigh, palm flat and fingers nudging his crotch and other, still unturned leg and he felt an intense sense of anticipation. Of wanting that hand to both burn through his crystal, and to simply slide up and wrap around him.

G’yozah’s fingers played there for a moment, sending small waves of heat so close to his crotch, and G’raha’s breath turned uneven, a small stream of soft whimpers and moans escaping his lips.

“How does it feel?,” G’yozah asked, and G’raha could hear he was smiling. _Good._.

“It feels…,” he started, pulling his hand back, closer to himself, resting so close to the edge of G’yozah’s smallclothes. Quick breaths. “Different? Very different… But it’s spreading through me, it’s— Your hand is _there_ but I can feel it in my toes? And it’s…”

Another wave of heat, making him gasp between words.

“It feels— I can _feel_ it’s you.”

“It is me.”

And suddenly the heat was replaced with a small spark, like lightning going through him, and he _gasped_, back arching.

“That’s—,” he said quickly, but found it hard to continue as the spark still tingled through him, small blasts of electricity, all the way to his spine, up his neck, even his cheek.

“Good?” G’yozah was grinning now, G’raha could tell, and all he could do was nod back. More, he just wanted more. This was— He’d not expected it to feel this much, this strongly, nor that it’d feel so… _right_. Familiar.

Like all that energy, all that aether, belonged inside him.

As another, stronger, spark of thunder hit, this time again travelling over his hip, to his tail, up his back, he understood.

If any aether belonged inside this crystal, if any aether was meant to fill him up, to spread through every ilm of crystallised flesh— It was G’yozah’s aether. He felt himself choke up, tears welling up in his eyes, even as he was ready to just grind his hips against G’yozah, to find release, the sensations of G’yozah’s magic having put his entire body aflame so quickly.

G’yozah hummed above him, and then his hand was all heat again, almost as if burning through the crystal, and G’raha gasped loudly.

”Touch yourself,” G’yozah whispered, in that tone that left no room for question. It made G'raha's ears twitch and warmth pool inside him. He nodded, again shifting to a better position, hand reaching down between his own legs. His face was only an ilm or two from the front of G'yozah's smallclothes, if he only scooted— A little bit lower, and he could press his face into the growing bulge there, taking a long, slow breath, the exhale becoming a moan, as he wrapped his only partly crystallised palm around himself.

There were more sparks, and the way they jolted through his body made it impossible to stay still. It was like... Maybe it was like being hit by lightning? Except the sparks spread evenly through him, reaching every ilm of crystal, and it tingled _painfully_ along the edges of his skin, burning. He wondered if it would leave marks, and whether those would scar, and then remain as that last skin was crystallised like the rest. Like the bite mark on his neck, that would never leave him. Teeth indentations forever protected in crystal.

He nuzzled his face into G'yozah, feeling him twitch and shift, breaths going more uneven, breaking into whimpers. He opened his mouth, and let it cover as much of G'yozah as it could, delighting in the way it made G'yozah jump under him, the next jolt of thunder unexpectedly strong.

He moaned, eyes closing again and squeezed himself harder, hand pumping quicker.

"More," he requested again, the word muffled by G'yozah's erection, and he could feel G'yozah nod, even as his body was shaking. G'raha wasn't sure why, but he wanted _more_, he wanted to _come_, and then— Then—

Lightning, so strong, up his spine, down his leg, and then right after there was fire, the burning heat mixing with the popping, sparking nature of the lightning and a _shout_ made it out his mouth. He curled together, he arched his back, he couldn't stay still, not as G'yozah's hand travelled back to his inner thigh, so close to where he was touching himself, to send off another wave of the same.

It _hurt_. It burned, he felt it so strongly, both in crystal and skin. He whimpered, moaned, felt more tears stinging in his eyes and he _loved it_. The amount of sensation was almost overwhelming, and it kept pulsating inside him, like a deposit of aether, travelling through him, inside him, there to stay.

One more blast of fire, G'yozah's fingertips passing just over the edge, burning, searing his skin, and G'raha came. He gasped, sobbed against G'yozah, body shaking in his lap. G'yozah's fingers quickly cooled down, but the heat, the sparks, they still travelled through him, waves of sensation that just kept going. He felt G'yozah's hand travel up his side, settle on his head and gently stroke his hair as he gasped and panted through the overwhelming experience. And now G'yozah's hand felt cooling, almost like wind in his hair, and another sob made it past his lips.

Some more breaths, long, slow, regaining power over his own body as the waves of sensation, of heat and electricity, slowly dissipated. Then he shuffled into a better position, finally able to use his hands to pull down G'yozah's smallclothes.

G'yozah hissed, and it quickly turned into a long moan as G'raha took him in. He shifted more to the front, onto his knees, making it easier for himself, and G'yozah's other hand finally let got of the medium, joining the other in his hair.

He used his different lips to his advantage, mixing the pressure, the way he knew G'yozah was weak for, turning his head to let the cool crystal hit different sides. G'yozah shuddered, twitched, under him, and his hands felt tense. Though he knew that G'yozah loved the crystal, loved how it felt, loved _him_, he wished that he could continue like this. Lick him, kiss him, suck him, take him in, provide warmth— not only cool crystal.

For how much longer would that be possible? Every day now, more of him disappeared, every day now, another part of him became cold and hard. He was still amused, how somehow, the crystal had only snaked down his legs, leaving his intimate parts to be among the last taken. But even there, the process had now started.

It didn’t take long for G’yozah to come in his mouth, nails digging into his scalp in that way that G’raha would miss. And he swallowed happily, while he still could.

As G’yozah was catching his breath, G’raha slowly crawled back onto his lap, pulling his knees close and resting his head against G’yozah’s chest. Feeling his quickened heartbeat.

”I wish I could’ve touched you,” G’yozah whispered, arms wrapping around him. ”But I’m happy, that it worked. That was… beautiful.”

G’raha smiled and straighter up enough to reach G’yozah’s lips for a soft kiss.

”I could feel it, all through the crystal.”

G’yozah grinned, but his eyes looked wet.

”That’s what I hoped for! Now if I can just… get those spells off in a controlled manner without the medium, before..:”

”Use me,” G’raha whispered, and looking up he saw G’yozah’s ears twitch in confusion. ”I’m crystal.”

”Would that… work?”

”It’d be worth a try,” he said with a soft smile. G’yozah’s fingers scratched the tip of his ear, and hummed.

”I liked it a lot. Your aether inside me. I can still feel it.”

”It’s left marks, you know,” G’yozah pointed out, one hand trailing down his shoulder to his back and his thigh, small bursts of pain hitting him as they found damaged skin.

”I was hoping it would. I hope they stay.”

”Hmm?”

”So I can be marked as yours even when there is nothing left to mark.” So that even if he were to become a statue, forever standing inside the tower, quietly guarding it, the impact the Warrior of both Light and Darkness had on him would be visible.

And even though to most they would look like nothing but battle scars, the aether inside him would tell a different story.

A story of love.

A story of understanding beyond anything he’d ever imagined.

G’yozah’s arms tightened around him, and his face fell down, hair tickling G’raha’s forehead. His breath was hot against G’raha’s ear, and his nails dug deep into whatever skin they could find.

”Then please,” he whispered, a small shaking in his voice. ”Mark me too.”

And G’raha knew that he would do whatever G’yozah wanted.

Anything.

And somewhere on his body, yet another ilm of crystal was formed.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading <3


End file.
